Discern

Yo. Haha. I've been claiming to myself that I have this ability to discern. Actually, it's very hard to accept the fact that you want it badly yet you don't see yourself perform it or see the measures of having a discernment.

But after sometime? I finally understood why God can't speak to me, why the Holy Spirit can't minister Jesus' ways in me.

In order for you to have discernment, you have to give up all your "worldly knowledge". Yes. God made me realize it last night while trying to connect other people to God. You see, you should have clean intentions why you need this, you must have a pure heart that only wants to serve the Lord, that is why you are asking it to God.

Maybe, God was trying so hard to minister me because in times of ministering to other people, I usually take MY actions first before God's - and it is just not so right. God has always doing His part on us, but what's the problem sometimes is that we, ourselves, decide on our own. It's like we're telling God, "wait, I can do this. it's been my job ever since." And this kind of job, I wonder what kind of evaluation did I made to other people.

I admit that I always read people through observations, I interpret their life according to their experiences. And what rebuked me? God alone can do this job. Why? Because we are no judges, we are only listeners, the ears of God here on Earth.

There's lots of things that happened this past few days and I wonder how God will turn things out. I know He has a plan, I know it's not to harm me or even my family, I know it's the best, I know it's something that would make us hold our Faith unto Him stronger than ever. So what do I need to do now? Work on my faith. Yes, Starting to build a faith from His righteousness.

Everything's just enough for us. The only problem is that we don't see how much we are blessed we much provided that is why we can't appreciate how much we still have. God doesn't leave us with problems that we can't deal. It's just that, we need to look around and see how we are favorable in His eyes.

Today, Beast died

Today, beast died. :'( She was my dog for more than 4 years, she was one of my guilty pleasures. God took her away and brought her first to heaven.

This is the second time that there happened a dog poisoning around our place.

One thing that is on my mind? "Beast died to spare my life." It's not like He's Jesus but this event tells me that I must do something before everything goes out before my eyes. Beast is dead. I cannot take her back. God has something best in replacement of her? It's painful but YES Lord, I am fine. Her death tells me that there is more of my life. He allowed Beast to die that I may continue to be God's instrument. Beast died, it's painful. She died and I didn't do anything. I should've known she was feeling that way. Worthless master? You bet it. I love my dogs. I really love them so much, more than any person in this world. Now, I just can't imagine when Don will leave me too. It's really stupid.

"Rau, everything comes down to Him."

14 But because by doing this you have made the enemies of the LORD show utter contempt, the son born to you will die." 15 After Nathan had gone home, the LORD struck the child that Uriah's wife had borne to David, and he became ill. 16 David pleaded with God for the child. He fasted and went into his house and spent the nights lying on the ground. 17 The elders of his household stood beside him to get him up from the ground, but he refused, and he would not eat any food with them. 18 On the seventh day the child died. David's servants were afraid to tell him that the child was dead, for they thought, "While the child was still living, we spoke to David but he would not listen to us. How can we tell him the child is dead? He may do something desperate." 19 David noticed that his servants were whispering among themselves and he realized the child was dead. "Is the child dead?" he asked. "Yes," they replied, "he is dead." 20 Then David got up from the ground. After he had washed, put on lotions and changed his clothes, he went into the house of the LORD and worshiped. Then he went to his own house, and at his request they served him food, and he ate. 21 His servants asked him, "Why are you acting this way? While the child was alive, you fasted and wept, but now that the child is dead, you get up and eat!" 22 He answered, "While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought, 'Who knows? The LORD may be gracious to me and let the child live.' 23 But now that he is dead, why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me." (1 Samuel 12:14-23)

I just don't understand why people would do such cruel thing. Lord, why? Why are they mean? Was it also because of my carelessness? :(

Sayonara Beast, let's meet in heaven soon 'kay? :">

That wasn't good. I forced myself to get angry. You got it right, there's the word forced. What she did was really stupid and that I didn't like. I told her to transfer the photos in the computer files that she may use the camera memory as possible as she can. And as i asked for the photos, she just told me, "you didn't tell me to transfer it." And I was like, "ok, so what's up with that?" I tried to nag at her until i realized I wasn't getting angry, then I tried to look for it. I wanted to express myself. I know, I too was stupid there. I wasn't being an example again right? But that was just really stupid. Yeah, both of us were stupid. Sigh. I ended up with a loud voice that obviously wants to cry because of that stupid reason.

akhgashdgakshdgasdygiaugiasdakjdhashg.

so annoying. sigh. i know its no good that i be looking for those photos again, i should've know. eeeeeeeeeeeeet. i'm irritated how she do things. as she grows older, she becomes somewhat immature. the more the person thinks she is independent and mature, the more she would be likely the opposite.

funny how i asked myself, "where's the anger?" back then, I was wondering what happened to me. that's how He works, don't you think? It's always a matter of choice. and as for me, there was a chance to not let get anger get in the way, yet i made a choice. anyways, that is a significant thing to me right now. the extraordinary that becomes an ordinary thing to do.

sigh. im getting tired of all the things around me. im getting tired with those people around me. i just want to be alone. i just want to be in harmony, at peace. i don't know. stupid. that was just so stupid.

By the time, the clock strikes at 12, I'll be leaving it behind. I will make it pass. That's just fine. Take a deep breath and exhale the burden.

GOD LOVES RAU ♥

We don't seem to notice it, but what we sometimes hate make us act it.

That's why, we should be careful. We should take heed of ourselves whether we are starting to hate something or someone because of what has happened, because in the end, we might be the one ending bitter, we'll become the one acting the same thing we hated from them.

So in order to avoid it, let's love and not hate. Hard isn't it? Because that's what love is, conquering every side of the world. :]

Today, i was wondering if i could relate my past relationship with Katy Perry's song: The one that I got away. ;)

I was just wondering.

Just wondering.

Haha.

It's nice to have experiences to laugh on. Hihi.

Do not be an answer to someone's problem

"Do not be self-righteous"
"See Me in that person"
"Do not grow tired from it"
"Love the person"
"Do not let emotions carry you"
"Do not be an answer nor make your self the answer"
"God loves you, me"
"It's going to be fine"
"You need to be courageous"

I'm in the house, house~

We are the Children of God!

Christians are not boring as others think ♥