But You're not.

I'm scared of my sharp edges,
or my tolerance for everything.
I'm scared that I'm too much to handle,
or I'm still not enough.
I'm scared that I might get hurt,
or I will hurt some.

I'm scared that I'm never really meant for greatness
or I'm just believing but not trusting.
I'm scared that I will not be able to live with the expectations,
or that I'll fail again.
I'm scared of what the future brings,
or for my past to haunt.

I'm scared because He's silent and I think
that He's not happy with me anymore,
that He's disappointed with me, or
that I'm not, never enough.

I'm scared that when I hear His voice again,
He'll tell me He'll leave me,
because I'm not strong enough,
because I'm not smart enough.

I'm scared that I'll never sum up to be the one He expects be to be.
I'm scared that all of my high and low days fed him.
I'm scared that He'll never accept me for all the things that I hate about myself.

I am ungrateful, independent and silent.
I worry and doubt a lot too.
I get angry and impatient.
And I bury hate and unlikely deep.

I'm scared,
but You're not.
You're not intimidated,
but remains committed.
You still look me in the eyes,
You still listen to my cries.
You remain to be patient,
and so kind.
You always open my hand
to hold and let go.
You were never disgusted with my past,
neither threatened of my today's life
nor my future decisions, mistakes and failures.
I'm not quite sure about You,
because I'm never confident about me.
You are perfect in all of Your ways,
and I am not.
I can understand if You would just leave me,
or You won't accept me back to You.
But You are always there, 
waiting for me to come to You.
To come home in Your accepting arms.
And I want, I will remain in this truth, slowly.
Help me to believe,
Help me to trust,
Help me to belong.
You're the only One, I've got.
My portion. My reward.
My goodness. My stillness.
My strength. My quietness.

You alone are enough.